After The Broken Glass
by rightafterscribe
Summary: The moments that follow Sif breaking the barrier at the end of "Who You Really Are" and the hours that come after. May's POV
1. Right after

I own nothing.

This is because I can't get over May's face after Skye shoots herself with the ICER. This has been banging around my head for a few days now. I've got a few chapters and I'll update as I go.

Thanks!

* * *

I turned my back to asses the oncoming threat, putting myself between her and anyone who might try to take her from me. Once the barrier came down It only took a second for her to decide to protect everyone else instead. I feel my weapon leave its place on my leg and I whirl around. Before I can even register what is going on she shoots herself and collapses to the bed. The shaking stops and I'm sure her heart does too.

"Skye?"

Her name slips out of my mouth with such sadness that I don't even recognize my own voice. I'm heartbroken.

Moving forward in an instant I recognize the blue tinge of her skin and that weapon itself is not my pistol.

By the time I'm dropping on to the bed I know it was just an ICER but it doesn't stop my fingers from seeking out a pulse in her neck. I know I can reach for the bio-meter on her wrist but I need to feel the life still in her. I need the reassurance she's still here. I find it beneath my fingers, thready, uneven and quick, too quick, but there. Certainly not the 61 BPM I've come to expect and I idly wonder if this just another side effect of the updated dendrotoxin.

It takes me half second to compose my racing thoughts and I begin to stroke her head protectively, I don't even understand what's being said behind me and I don't care, I will not let _this girl_ go, I will not let anything happen to _this girl_. I cannot lose _her._

I listen to Coulson as he convinces our visiting Asgardian that keeping the girl with us is the best course of action. Somewhere in the pit of my stomach I don't know if he believes that entirely, I don't know if I do either, but I'm willing to take that chance, he is too. We can do this, we have to do this.

One more check of the unconscious girl's pulse and I find it's evened out, still racing, but at this point she's resting as comfortably as she can be, and I'm still not ready to leave her side.

"You'll look after her?" Coulson asks, startling me out of reverie. He knows he doesn't need to ask, and I know I don't need to answer but a silent nod is exchanged and I know it conveys everything I need it too.

He and our visitor head back upstairs and I adjust myself so I'm cradling her head in my lap. She's going to have one hell of a headache after this, especially with the recent upgrades to the ICERS. All I can do at this point is hold her, stroke her head and be there for her when she wakes up.


	2. Fitz

I shouldn't be surprised a few moments later when Fitz walks down the stairs. He stops, stares, and I can see the confusion in his eyes, even a little disgust.

"See, this is why we didn't say anything!" He screeches, words surprisingly clear.

"What is is is th this? You shot her?"

Words said so long ago by the girl laying my lap play over in my head "shoot first ask questions later?" How times have changed.

I know his emotions have been all over the place since the bottom of the ocean, but this is a little much, and we already have enough to heightened emotions for this to continue.

"Fitz, do you really think I'd let anything happen to her?"

He pauses at this, his hands coming up to the sides of his face as I watch him try to piece it together...

"She, she um... Um, she...?" I feel for the kid I really do, I know what and why she did it, but it didn't make seeing it any easier.

"Yes"

He looks again, pauses, but doesn't look any more placated by the idea.

"I'm sorry" he mumbles.

I sigh, unsure of how much he's apologizing for, but that's a different conversation for a different time. For now my priorities are keeping Skye safe and comfortable.

"We can talk about everything later, but for now can you get me an ice pack wrapped in a cloth for her face, some water and those fast acting pain killers? She's going to be in a hell of a lot of pain when she wakes up."

He nods and says nothing and leaves. I continue to run my fingers through her hair, watch the rise and fall of her chest and wait for her to regain consciousness. My hands drift to her neck once again. Her pulse pushes against my fingers, calmer than before but still quicker than I'd expect for a fit, unconscious girl. Too tired to count, I reach for her wrist and press the button on her bio-meter. _105 BPM_ I stare at the number in wonder for a minute and try to process what (other than the obvious) could cause such a high resting rate. I press it again as Fitz comes back down the stairs with everything I asked for. I see his gaze move to my fingers, and her bio-meter.

"Her, um, her heartbeat, it's um... It's okay? She's gonna be okay? It's not too, um, it's not too high?"

I don't have to wonder if he already knows that it is, it's why, exactly, that's the first question he asks that comes to mind.

"Fitz..."

"No, I know, a conversation for another time."

"No!" I say to him, I need to at least know the start of this

"I need you tell me what you know, I can't help if I don't know."

He hesitates, because he's afraid of getting in trouble or because a he's afraid of betraying Skye's secret I don't know, but at this point I don't care, the secret is out, and I need to make sure there is nothing else I don't know. I shoot him a glare.

"Um, I um... I fixed the meter she was wearing in the temp, temp.. In the cave, and the readings were... Uh... Confusing?"

He paused to collect the rest of his thoughts. Then looks right at me, wide eyed and afraid .

"Her heart rate at the time of the collapse, and the earth qu, quake, was recorded at ... at 300 BPM." he stammered out.

I swear, my own heart rate jumped to 300 beats per minute, that's not just fast, that's impossible. Different or not, alien or not, that seems taxing and dangerous to organ still racing in her chest.

"Fitz, is that how figured out something was ... Different?" I refuse to use the word wrong, but nothing about this is right either.

He has the common sense too look ashamed at least.

"That, that's how it started... A heartbeat like that, it's, it's, inhuman... So I ch checked the blood samples, and they, they were... Different too."

So he lied about the samples as well, I should have known something was off in the lab, I'm sure there was more conversation to be had, but now wasn't the time.

"Okay," I sighed "we'll deal with all that later. For now I need you to go tell Coulson I need to see him."

He shakes his head but says nothing and proceeds to head up the stairs.

I brush my fingers through Skye's hair again, reach for the ice pack Fitz brought and place it on Skye's forehead, hoping even while unconscious it helps to ease her pain.


	3. Coulson

Still don't own them

* * *

Coulson comes down a few minutes later, he stops at the bottom of the stairs, and it looks like he's aged 10 years in the last half hour. He glances down at the girl in my arms, and I know what he's feeling because I'm feeling it too. There is so much we have to talk about but first I need to know we're safe for the moment.

"The Kree?" I ask him

"In another holding cell, Bobbi used his weapon to wipe his memory... Sif is watching him."

"Good..." I'm glad Sif is distracted as well.

He comes closer, stopping before reaching the bed, unsure in his movements.

It takes him a moment longer before he decides to sit down at her feet on the bed. His hand moves to her arm. Both of us feeling the need to protect this girl.

"How's our girl?" He asks quietly.

I continue to run my fingers through her hair, stalling as I try to figure out how to best answer the question. I go for the obvious choice.

"Clearly still unconscious, and she's going to feel it when she finally wakes up."

He nods and continues to rub her arm. "Simmons did say they had updated the ICERS, they're supposed to be able to neutralize the stronger... threats"

"Don't call her a threat!" I say through gritted teeth.

He looks throughly chastised and a little sad.

"Hey... Okay, okay. I'm not, I'm not...but Melinda"

He only calls me Melinda when it's serious, and this is as serious as it gets.

"I know Phillip" I can use his full name too.

And I do know, I know everything is about to get way more complicated,I know we might not be able to handle this, I know we might be in over our heads, but I also know that no matter how in over our heads we are we need to do our best to keep from drowning, to keep _her _from drowning.

"What do we do now? "

He may be the director, but _I'm _Skye's S.O. so I know he's leaving this up to me. But I don't want to make any decisions until I can talk to her herself.

I take a deep breath. With everything that I do know there is so much more that I can't predict, so much more that I fear...

I still haven't answered. We sit in silence, both of us lost in our own thoughts. There is nothing we can do, there is so much more we need to talk about but neither of us are ready, and neither of us want to do it until we talk to her. So for now all we can do is hold our girl.

I take another deep breath, and I finally answer.

"I don't know, Phil, I just don't know."


	4. Skye

This one took me awhile to write, and I ended up splitting it up with another chapter that will come later. Also after last nights episode my head is all confused...

* * *

It's hours later when I notice the change in her breathing signaling she's starting to come out of her stupor.

If the fact that she's feverish and sweaty is any indication she'll feel like crap when she's fully awake. Whether it's from the ICER shot or a side effect of her new found abilities remains to be seen. I do know she'll be disoriented so I continue to run my fingers through her hair in a hopes to keep her calm. I hate that I'm worried she'll set off another quake, but I know I can't risk it. More so, I can't handle watching her ICE herself again.

I had Fitz bring me another ice pack in the last half hour, and I move to place it on her head.

She sighs and stirs in my arms, her eyes blink open and I can see the confusion in them. Realization creeps in and before I can say anything she gasps and sits up. The movement entirely to fast for her fevered state I see her head waver.

"I'm gonna be sick." She mumbles

I move to her side again and guide her to the cell bathroom as fast as I can. We barely make it before she begins to heave, emptying the contents of her stomach. I'm helpless again as I hold her hair and rub her back as I let nature take its course. It takes a few minutes for her to stop throwing up, and even longer for her chest to stop heaving. She rests her head on the toilet for a moment before slowly sitting up.

She turns her gaze to mine and I can see everything in her brown eyes.

"I'm sorry." She whispers.

I sigh, I know what's happening to her is not her fault, but I wish she felt she could have come to me, maybe she wouldn't have had to ICE herself and maybe we wouldn't be sitting in a cell in our basement.

"I know Skye." I tell her quietly.

"We can talk about everything later. Right now though, let's get some water in your system and you can lay back down."

She nods and I can see the effort is too much for her head.

"And maybe some pain killers yeah?" I ask.

The corner of her mouth almost twitches upward. I move to help her up and we slowly make our way back to the bed. I lean her against the wall and reach for the bottle of water and small cup of the liquid pain killer.

I hand her the pain killer first and watch as she swallows it and grimaces. But it has almost an immediate effect and I can see her visibly relax. One of the advantages to S.H.I.E.L.D science is fast acting pain killers.

I hand her the bottle of water.

"Small sips, we don't want to upset your stomach anymore."

She nods, and swallows slowly.

I move to sit next to her and reach for her the bio-meter on her wrist. She pulls her hand away from mine suddenly. Her eyes wide.

"Hey, hey it's okay, I know what's going on, I checked your pulse while you were out, and Fitz told me about his findings."

She looks ashamed, but holds out her wrist anyway.

I press the button on her watch and am relieved at the number I find. _85 BPM _blinks at me and I turn it over to show her.

"Not bad," I say "it's relaxed since earlier, it was up over 100 when I first checked."

She nods, her silence is almost as unnerving as anything else that's happened today.

She takes another sip of water, before

"Fitz told me my heartbeat was almost 300 beats per minute in the temple." She chokes out.

"That can't be healthy, unless of course I'm not... he said it wasn't, it can't...oh God... what if I'm not...?" her breathing starts to increase and I can see the panic building in her eyes. I need to stop her from spinning before she sets off another quake

I grab her hands, in mine and look directly into her eyes.

"Skye look at me, listen, breathe... take a deep breath, come on, you can do this... I've got you."

I notice the bed start to shake a little bit and I know I have to try and stop this before it goes any further.

"Skye, please, focus, just like in Tai Chi, follow my breathing."

I lock eyes with her and I hold her hands to my chest just above my heart and breathe deep, hoping she'll be able to pick up on the rhythm.

She takes a deep shaky breath, and I can feel her trying to get everything under control. I feel her take another and soon I feel the bed stop shaking, but I'm not going to let her go yet.

"Good, keep breathing, a few more deep breaths."

Once she's calmed enough I remove her hands from my chest, and hold them in my lap. She's still far to warm and pale for my liking and I coax her to lay back down. Once she's on her side, I place the ice pack back on her forehead and I need I move to get up. I need get cleaned up and I need to find Coulson. I am just off the bed and before I even have the chance to tell her I'll be right back she reaches her hand back out to mine.

"No." She whispers horsely, her voice sounds like it's fighting off tears.

"Please don't go, don't leave me." She lost the fight and few tears slip down her face.

I sit back down beside her and clear the tears from her cheeks.

"Okay, I'm not going anywhere, I'm right here, I've got you." I whisper reassuringly. "You're gonna be okay, I'm right here."

The last of her resolve breaks, and tears start to stream down her face in rapid succession.

My own aren't far behind.

I don't know what is going to happen in the coming weeks, or the coming days, or even in the next few hours, but for now I can be here while she cries.


	5. Family

We sit in silence after we both stop crying. She's peeled off all her extra layers and tied her hair up and she's now much less feverish than she was before. She's curled against my side with her head my shoulder quietly sipping her bottle of water.

Coulson comes down the stairs then. He's carrying ginger ale, crackers and another bottle of water. His intuition has always astounded me.

I feel Skye tense beside me. I think she's afraid she's going to get in trouble, or that Coulson and I will try and send her away. I know the orphan in her is constantly afraid we'll tell her she's "not a good fit." And with everything going on she'll be afraid she's "too much work." It's going to process, sure, but in my mind nothing could be further from the truth.

He sees her tense next to me and in turn approaches us slowly, he stops just before the would be barrier and waits till our girl looks up to meet his eyes.

"Hey kid, how you doing?" He asks quietly.

I feel the tension drain from her almost immediately when she realizes Coulson isn't mad at her. I'm surprised she doesn't launch herself into his arms. The girl she was last week would have.

She just shrugs at first.

"I'm... I'm not really sure how to answer that." She says.

"That's fair." He nods.

"Well I know the ICERS can make you feel pretty gross, maybe I can at least help with that?" He sets the items on the table in front of us.

"What did you bring me?" She asks him, peeking at the items on the table

"Oh did you think this was for you?" He smirks.

She almost does the same, maybe our Skye isn't too far gone.

"Well here we have the finest ginger ale this side of... this side of the playground anyway. And next... saltines... there is no way to really make those exciting."

Phil is adorable when he's trying to hard. And he's trying _so _hard to make Skye feel like everything is going to be okay. I know we all know right now it's not, but heaven help Phil, he's going to do everything he can to make this situation as comfortable as possible. I am too, of course. But I've always been more realistic.

Our girl sits up and nods her head in thanks, and Coulson hands her the bottle of ginger ale and a coupe of crackers. She sips the liquid slowly and nibbles on a cracker. Coulson gestures towards the open spot on the bed, and she nods, curling back up next to me to make more room for him.

We all sit in silence for a few more moments while Skye nibbles and sips.

Finally, she breaks the silence.

"What's going to happen to me?" She asks us quietly.

"I can't stay here..." she says it like she really believes that we'd send her away.

"Skye... " I start

"...Of course you're going to stay here, what makes you think otherwise?" Coulson finishes.

She takes a deep breath and sighs, I can feel her tense up again.

"I lied to you. I lied to you and I'm a monster and I don't deserve to stay here." She rushes out.

Coulson meets my eyes over her head. He nods at me to answer our girl. I shift so I can grab on to her hand.

"You deserve to be here, you're not a monster. You're an Agent of Shield, an important member of this team, and more important than all of that you're Skye, you're a member of this weird little family and you're important to us... you're important to _me_. We're not going to abandon you just because you're different, or because you've lied to us, which don't think we won't talk about later, because we will. But who among us hasn't lied, or kept something from anyone on this team or in this family? "

I spent the whole first year on this team lying to them, to Phil, to myself. I know what it's like to fear you'll never be forgiven.

She closes her eyes and and swallows and I can tell she's trying to not cry, maybe even trying not to start another tremor. She opens her eyes and nods.

Coulson leans forward and picks up her other hand.

"She's right, Skye, we're going to figure this out. I can't promise it will be easy, and I can't promise that we have any idea what we're doing, but we're willing to try if you are. Okay?"

"Okay..." she responds.

"That's our girl. Come on let's get you back to your bunk I can't imagine it's too comfortable in this cell. We'll get Simmons to to run a quick physical to make sure you're stable and the ICER didn't have any more negative effects." He tells her.

Neither of us miss the flinch on her face and the tense of her muscles. Her grip of our hands tightens and she shakes her head. I can tell immediately that she's beginning to panic. Her breathing is starting to become erratic.

"No... please...no" she gasps out.

"Okay...okay. Skye's it's okay, you don't have to move, it's alright, we've got you, you don't have to go anywhere yet." Coulson tries to calm her down. I see the water and the ginger ale on the table start to vibrate, and I know we've got to stop this quickly.

I place her hand on my chest again and breathe deep. I feel her try do the same.

"That's it Skye, deep breaths, come on. Follow me. In for 4... out for 8..." I can feel her struggling to get air in and follow the pattern, but we've done this before and I know she can get her breathing under control before she loses control of her new found abilities.

"In for 4... out for 8... ... you're okay, take another breath, okay?"

It takes a few minutes but she finally has it under control. I reach for her bio-meter and find an elevated 95 BPM. Elevated for sure, but not inhumanly so, and seeing as nothing, not even Skye herself is shaking, it's the best I can hope for right now.

She takes a couple more deep breaths as Coulson kneels in front of her, and reaches out to touch her face and get her to meet his eyes.

"You wanna tell us why you don't want to go upstairs?" he asks her.

"It's not... it's not that I don't want to be out of this cell, it's just, everyone _knows _now. Everyone is going to be afraid of me, and Sim..." she clams up. It's not lost on either of us.

"Simmons what?" I ask her, running a hand through her hair.

"Simmons thinks I'm something to be put down." She says sadly.

"What?!" Coulson snaps.

Skye recoils at his tone. I know it wasn't directed at her, but it doesn't stop me from glaring at Coulson.

"I'm sorry." He says.

"But, what? What do you mean she thinks you're something to put down?" He asks.

Skye sighs and rubs her eyes.

"Um she said, that whatever happened to Raina's DNA was a plague that she had to stop, she needed to terminate it. And I heard her tell you guys she thought we should put Raina down."

It's true, Simmons did say that, but I hope it was out of grief and understandably fear coming from something she couldn't fix. I'll have to speak to Simmons.

"Skye, she's not going to terminate you, Jemma loves you, and what happened to Raina, and what she did after has nothing to do with you..." I tell her.

"But I'm not different than her, Fitz said the samples of my blood were just like hers, that makes me the same as her." She whispers

"Skye!" Coulson jumps in.

"Skye, Raina killed people down in in that shaft after she was transformed, you haven't hurt or killed anyone, you're still Skye, different maybe, but you're still a good person. You haven't done anything wrong." He says.

"Yeah, well Tell that to Jemma, and ... Mack. They seem to think that I'm to blame for all Trip's death. And who is to say I'm not?" She asks bitterly.

"We do." I tell her and I wrap my arms around her as best I can.

"We do, and don't let anyone tell you differently. That was _not _your fault. Trip died a hero, he went in there to save you, and no one could have known what was going to happen." I whisper into her hair.

"May's right Skye, there was nothing you could have done, and nothing that has happened to you or since is your fault."

Skye takes a deep and shaky breath and let's it out slowly. I can see her rolling our words around in that brain of hers, trying to work out if she believes what we said. She might not believe us now, but I hope hearing them helps for the moment.

"Okay." She says, "I'll go upstairs but I don't want to talk to anyone and I don't want to have to be checked over by Simmons."

I can understand that, for now anyway. Jemma being our resident bio expert, and subsequently our on call medical doctor Skye is going to need to see her for a full physical at some point. I don't like the effects that few hours have had on Skye's health at all and I need to know what we can do to keep her healthy, especially now.

"We'll talk to Jemma." I tell her.

She nods, I know she knows she'll have to be seen at some point.

"I'll talk to Mack as well." Coulson says.

"There is one more thing we have to talk about though." He continues.

"May and I have to drop Sif and the Kree off someplace so she can return home, so we're going to need to leave for a little bit. Are you going to be okay for a couple of hours?" He looks sad to even have to request this of her, and of me, but I know it has to be done.

Skye blinks at me for a moment, eyes wet with unshed tears, but eventually she nods.

"Okay, but I want to stay in the cage." She exclaims.

I see Coulson recoil at that statement as well. He goes to protest but Skye cuts him off.

"I'm not going to fight with you on this, it's safer for everyone." She looks down.

"I'd feel safer too." She adds quietly.

If she's afraid of losing control again and hurting someone on the base, or if she's actually scared of Summons and Mack, I don't know and I guess either way it doesn't matter. If that's what she wants at the moment I can't deny her that. And as much as I hate to admit it, it's probably the best idea until we can figure out how to help her truly control this. The cage should be able to contain any vibrations.

"Fine." I say.

"Fine? May?" Coulson questions, he looks confused and annoyed.

"Yes." I confirm.

"Fine. Skye if that's what you want we can work with that. But I have some conditions." I put on my SO voice to make sure she knows I mean it. I will leave Skye in the cage, but I'm not going to isolate or lock her away.

"First, you let me get it ready for you, no one is punishing you for anything and you deserve to still be comfortable."

She nods.

"Second, tonight before you head to the bus you need to shower, try to eat somethibg and pack a bag with the items you want with you. You can do that while I'm getting everything situated. Coulson will be near to keep the others away."

She nods again.

"Third, you either let me monitor your vitals remotely, or you let me or Coulson or Fitz sit on the floor outside your door for the evening."

I know she'd find the monitoring of her vitals to be annoying and an invasion of privacy, but from my own experience I know she wants to be alone so I know she won't agree to us sitting outside her door. Though to be honest, I can't promise I won't check on her every hour anyway. I'll tell her and Phil it's only because I want to make sure she stays calm and doesn't panic, and doesn't set off any quakes, and that she needs us if either happens. I'll only tell myself it's also because I know what it's like to be afraid of yourself, to be atfraid you're a monster, I know what it's like to feel totally helpless and totally hopeless. I will only admit to myself that in that moment after the ICER went off I thought she'd taken her own life, and I will only admit to myself that I'm still terrified that she might actually still do it.

Coulson is starring at me intently, I realize he's already aware of the things I won't say out loud. I know this is killing him too. I know he hates how readily I agreed to this but we've got to keep our girl safe, and more importantly we've got to make sure she feels safe. We both look at Skye for acknowledgment.

"Um, sure you can, you should probably monitor my vitals, don't want to cause quakes if I can help it." She agrees quietly.

"Alright, it's settled then. I'll go make the cage more comfortable, Coulson will take you to your bunk and then to my en suite so you can shower in peace, and then he'll make you some soup and then you can pack a bag with the rest of your things and you can head to the bus."

Both agree to the plan and Phil and I help Skye off the bed and make sure she can walk before I turn to her one more time.

"I'm going to upstairs first and maybe glare at anyone in the hallway before you and Coulson head up."

She actually grins at that.

"Then I've got to prep the quin jet but I'll check on you when we get back okay?"

"Okay." She says.

"I'm going to go up now." I nod at Phil who gives me a small smile as he still holds on to our girl. I know he'll take care of her while getting everything ready.

I start to head towards the stairs and I'm started by a blur of Skye who presses herself into every bit of my space with a bone crushing hug. I can feel some tears on my shoulder.

"Thank you." she whispers as I wrap my arms around ger too.

Phil approaches from behind and runs a hand through her hair.

I smile at him over the top Skye's head. There is a long, scary, and uncharted road ahead of us but we're going to figure this out. I'd be lying if I didn't say I was worried that this would be more than we could handle, but I'm willing to do whatever we have to do.

"Of course Skye." I respond.

"We're family."


End file.
